When you left me all alone
At the record hop,
Said that you were going out
For a soka pop.
You were gone for quite a while,
Half an hour or more.
When you came back, man oh man!
This is what I saw:

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted in Song quotations | Print | No Comments »

Subtext

Thursday 04 Mar 2010 by Orphi the AweKid.

Ah yes, the things advertisers like to say between the lines. Like the advert for Bupa health care. The cute, cuddly animations and Steven Fry’s calm, soothing voice. But what are they really saying here?

Misus Smith tripped over and broke her leg. [Oh no!] But it’s OK, she’s with Bupa. [Because she’s superior to all you people who have to reply on the NHS.] She went straight to her Bupa representative [because she’s special, and deserves special treatment], and got to see a specialist the same day. [The NHS has huge waiting lists.] She stayed in a nice, clean hospital. [The NHS doesn’t clean things properly.] The operation was done the next day [The NHS has huge waiting lists.], and she was out in no time. [Because, let’s face it, the body’s ability to heal is based solely on which hospital you go to and who treats you.]

In other words, the general message here seems to be “The NHS is incompetent. Rich people can afford better. Join us.” Mmm, way to use people’s preconceived fears and prejudices to sell a product!

Posted in Random | Print | 2 Comments »

Nutritional information

Friday 22 Jan 2010 by Orphi the AweKid.

I just ate a packet of salt & vinegar hoolahoops. As a result, my lips are now numb.

Anyway, I had a look at the ingredients list. Surprisingly, it tells you how much sunflower oil is in there (28%), but not how much potatoe is in there. Which is interesting. (Reassuringly, potatoe is the first ingredient on the list.)

For me, the real kicker was this:

This packet contains approximately 2 servings.

Erm, WTF? Who the hell buys a packet of crisps and eats half of it?! That’s absurd! Nobody does this!

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted in Random | Print | 5 Comments »

In your dreams

Thursday 03 Dec 2009 by Orphi the AweKid.

It’s just like make-believe.
Each night it’s New Year’s Eve.
Each day it’s Christmas Day.
You make me feel this way.
It’s gonna snow outside,
The weather will be cold.
But I’ll be wa^aa_arm this winter!

Posted in Song quotations | Print | 1 Comment »